Deel- that sucks, addictions- all of them suck. You do not. You do trust SR type people. It is not you. You are not stupid or naïve or anything like that..
Do you have someone you can talk to - a professional? Al- anon, a counsellor?
Perhaps go and see your doc. You need to calm down, remember to eat, hydrate and rest. Post a zillion times. Do not do anything- like make big decisions or send emails or post on f/b when you are highly emotionally charged. Stay safe. Do you have some where you can go- to stay, neutral ground...to collect your thoughts? I have no answers- just that I am concerned about your emotional well being..and to get support.
Empathy and support offered. PJ