Originally Posted by
tomsteve 
if being you is
I often throw furniture or hit people at meetings.
smack fire out your face
i'm not going to be told I'm pretending to have mental illness just to get a check, and not hurt you.
it could be something even AA or NA cant help with. it might be wise to seek outside help.
i could see those actions being taken care of by banning a member from a meeting. its quite negative to be acting or responding that way,dont you think?
we have a responsibility to protect other members. we have to aceept people the way they are, but dont have to allow unacceptable behavior in the rooms.
have you looked into dual diagnosis meetings?
I'm gonna make different meetings, and maybe only three a week now and do my MICA groups (at outpatient) more often. I do better in small, quiet meetings. But it makes no sense to read 12-step literature, have a 12-step sponsor but make no meetings at all. If I fall apart again, maybe I'll seek those dual diagnosis groups. There are none in my area and i don't drive. But there may be some 90 minutes away by train.
I talked to a few people about these incidents and some of the recent stuff happening past three months and I wasn't okay. I had no choice but to comitt myself for observation for a few days. I'm on a different meds now and will see my Psych Doctor twice a month as opposed to once a month. I still need a therapist though.
It's very clear I was wrong and why so many people stay away from me. There's no sense in getting revenge because the madness will never stop and then it's more like a war. And it's not possible to kill everyone when you think about it.
But I'm no longer on the pity pot and trying to mind my business and keep the focus. Everyone gets harsh criticism around here and sometimes neglect. I'm not unique.
- I have a friend with no education and says silly stuff and members insults his intelligence.
- I have a Buddhist friend who people mistreat because of the way he shares due to spending so much time with his Buddhists community.
- I lot of people stay away from the female I assaulted because she refuses to do therapy and psychiatry even though she's out of control.
- I have a former sponsor whose wealthy and has a title which he always announces and some people give him stuff for that.
I live in a major city known for it's characters all over, not just in the rooms. It's important to be aware of our powerlessness here. We are just some moody, self-willed people.
It's not realistic for everyone to like or understand me.