I watched the shows called 'addicted' not sure if you have? And the host who is a recovered addict says to the family members, that 'as long as they are breathing, there is hope for a recovery'. I would hold onto that thought.
I didn't have many friends due to being new in my area, and the two that I made are heavy drinkers. one is happy to continue, and I told her I was quitting, well, I barely hear from her anymore. Depsite her saying she would support me and not drink around me. Well, she doesn't, because she doesn't text, invite me places or come to see me anymore. I really didn't expect that.
My other, wants to cut down and quit, but is finding it really hard. I don't know her level of commitment, so I support her. I don't want to cut her off, because she really is my only friend, which sounds ridiculous I know!! But when you move around a lot, its tough to make new friends, especially as I am a private home person.
I can only be there, and ikeep telling her what I'm doing when she asks, I try and be the influence that orders the water, but when she orders an alcoholic drink which is most times, I cant do anything, that's her choice. Her alcohol issue, is not mine, I cant take hers on as well as my own. But what I am grateful for, is that she doesn't only see me as her drinking buddy, we do plenty of sober stuff,I think she may be the only genuine friend I have had since my teens, that goes beyond alcohol, so she is worth standing by.
the relationships that change when you quit show friendships for what they really are. Its a real shame, but we have to look after ourselves first. You are doing great and I know the dilemma. I have hope for you and your friend!