It's been just over two years for me. For most of that time I spent all my energy working on myself, and was unfortunately in a very depressed haze. When I got to a certain point I realized I needed medication. Antidepressants have been the missing piece in healing and I'm at a really great place now. It gets better! I think about my ex and I realize we were such a bad fit even outside of his drinking, but my codependency kept me with him. I feel so much more my authentic self. I think a lot of work on ourselves is essential after these relationships. I feel like a new person and it took WORK, but it's worth it.