Originally Posted by
Hitbytrain 
Is this common? Is it because the alcoholic is avoiding or they have no sense of responsibility or they're just selfish and they want to do the things that are fun and then void the things that aren't fun?
I think it's sort of a combination of things. Mostly, a desire to avoid examining the things they are failing at by inflating the importance of things they are still "managing."
The bottom line for partners is to not get sucked into the insanity of the alcoholic's view of reality. Very tough in the beginning, especially since a lot of us have spent a lot of time/energy trying to deny reality, ourselves. Coming out of denial and facing painful truths is hard for everyone.