yES. I am the same way as you...I do not believe that they are too selfish because a guy from my town just killed himself from a drug overdose 2 weeks ago..I actually think my AH may have even taken pills and went to sleep since he sent me that message. My AH doesn't want to go for help either. (he attempts to on his own and fails over and over) He went to a meeting back the end of March and was clean and sober for 2 months. My AH has a good job and $ as well and I told him yesterday to quit that job and he said he cannot right now..He gambles on top of all this, so I don't know where he thinks he is actually getting himself. 27 years of marriage is a really long time!