Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them an extra bullet for their gun because they missed you the first time.
Have you not had enough hurt, pain and disappointment from this guy? Why would you even think about opening that door again? Have you not learned anything here at SR or about alcoholism?
You seem to always be setting the stage so that you are constantly on the receiving end of hurt and pain and at your own hands.........not his or anyone else's but yourself.