Hi there, wine was also my thing. I did the same things as you. I am only on day 2. We all know how youre feeling. Youre in really good hands here. This is a wonderful beginning, and such a wonderful place to start.
I would also suggest that you come to the chat room if youre desperate at night and trying to stay away from wine. If no one is there, wait a little while for someone to come on and also post in the forum as often as you need to. You WILL get the support you need here to break this painful, self abuse.
We all want to stay sober here, and we all know how painful this cycle us.
Its a GREAT step that you posted here today.
Stick around and keep on communicating and reading, no matter what.
Its possible to get sober. It really is <3