Jewgirl952

I pulled myself out of a marriage to an alcoholic who stayed sober for six years. He sponsored people. He and I went to meetings together and I learned so much. I'm not an alcoholic, never liked the feeling of alcohol, must be too much of a control freak to let myself feel that kind of loss of control. Anyway, after six years he picked up again and stayed out there since 1997, so he's gone. I got myself away from him in 1999. In 2001 I got back with my first husband who was a perfect husband. We married 1969, divorced 1979 (my fault, joined a cult, was very young). Didn't take very long to realize that he's an alcoholic. We separated, then got back together. We go back to 1967 and this is really hard for me. I have a 12-year-old that saw her own father drunk enough and doesn't need this. My present husband won't own his alcoholism, except for when he's drunk and is soooo sorry and will get help. After two days, like clockwork, he goes back into denial. I can't put my daughter through this and I'm scared. I have a phobia about being around new people. I'm overweight and self-conscious. But I sure would love to talk with somebody who can help me, like a sponsor, somebody who's been there and done that. I ran away from the last one, but I feel too old and tired to go through it again.