Cap3

Asking another person {who may be still sick themselves,not working on their own recovery}what kind of amends do you want?Can be very harming,.Ive known some alcoholics who have done this.They became door-mats,/hostages,until they stoped.No matter what they did,it just wasn't enough.The non-alcoholic continuing to hold the hammer over the alcoholics head.The alcoholic,pays over and over and over and over,.When does it stop?When the one who is still offened decides?The non-alcoholic plays a part in the family disease,called alcoholism.Have they asked their alcoholic,what kind of amends do you want?How can i ever make up to you my dear alcoholic all the grudges,resentments,anger,etc,,that ive held against you,and treating you badly?The insanity only stops when one is living in recovery program.and the goal is to get weller.Holding grudges,trying to make another,do their amends the way i want it to be made,is ,,well,,what can i say,other than the non-alcoholic is still trying to control yet again,to their own selfish satisfaction.To each their own,...
There is no pain big enough that God can not heal.I say this from my own experience.
Thanks for letting me share,
Im personally sharring this as an alcoholic myself,and also in al-anon too.Im only one,of da many.