Originally Posted by Deelilah

He almost went back out last night. He is not in recovery. He's trying to abstain, which means he's going to fail. He will relapse.


So my problem is that suddenly I have become a person who checks phone records online, checks to see if his keys are in the room instead of his pockets, searches his truck to look for paraphernalia, constantly assesses his behavior, obsess about what I'll do when he uses again, etc.