Welcome back,
I'm really glad you're back.
My mother also died of lung cancer, and we had been all-but estranged for years. I saw her before she died, but did not attempt to reconnect emotionally because I knew she would deny all the abuse. I have not regretted my choice for a single moment.
I'm glad you're back. I hope you're working on a recovery plan that will help you accomplish sobriety.