ya know it's funny, when i left my last husband (he was NOT the drinker, i was) he was weighing in somewhere between 350-400. he'd always had a weight problem - we had both done J/C together and he lost a lot of weight, looked great, me too - but it was not sustainable.
anywho, we met up about a year later - had some divorce/finance stuff to wrap up, and he had some stuff i'd left behind to return. i was sitting at a starbucks, outside, and heard a man's voice say Well Hello There!
i did not recognize the person at first. it was my ex - he'd had lap band surgery, lost about 150 pounds (?), had let his hair grow WAY out and died it blonde. also bought a motorcycle. and new gf (she wasn't WITH him of course!!).
and to be honest? i thought he looked WORSE than at his higher weight. he looked gaunt and a bit grey, and the straggly long blonde hair did him no favors.
but it was not MY place to say ANY of that!!! it wasn't even my place to wonder why he "waited" until i left to deal with the weight. he made
his own choices for
his own reasons and was conducting HIS life as HE saw fit.
live and let live.
last i had heard and that was years ago, he'd started to put the weight back on. i do know he and the gf got married - he's 4th. and that's ALL i know. i wonder sometimes how he's doing. i hope he is well. but it's none of my business. so i just send up some good thoughts and move on!