Hi dear Peach. Your honesty is so inspiring
I'm glad you're here and posting!
I've never lived with an alcoholic - I was the alcoholic. It sounds like your boyfriend is caught in a terrible spiral and he needs to be away in a place where he could focus solely on getting clean and healthy, physically and emotionally. Have you discussed the idea of a treatment center? You can't force him to go, of course, but he probably needs a detox before he can start thinking clearly. One of the main reasons I kept drinking was fear of withdrawal and anxiety.
That's no excuse, of course, but before my first alcohol related withdrawal episode I had no idea how dangerous it is.
I totally understand your apprehension about leaving him. It's horrible to see someone you love engaging in behavior that you know is not who they really are. But I can tell you from experience, alcoholics start to lose sight of who they are when they're in the vicious cycle of abuse.
I think the best thing would be to get him away from the toxic influences in a detox followed by rehab. It's a safe environment and will help him get to the root of the problem!!
Good luck and keep posting - it helps keep us all sober