Frustration vent.
Just a vent it to the universe post:
I had a counseling appointment this morning that never happened. Not sure if it was cancelled or what as my email communication goes through my work email and I don't work the end of the week. I really needed this appointment. And am feeling frustrated and lost.
AH and I finally talked again this morning and basically came to the understanding that he should find his own place. I'm feeling sad at crushing both his dream and my own for that matter on what our lives could have been or where we could be...you know the American dream.
He doesn't want to let me go. He worries that if he moves out it might be the end of us. I told him I can't make any guarantees or promises, but I can't let 15+ years of personal hell disappear just because of two months of "good" behavior. He is trying...in his way. But I know this is what needs to happen. I'm putting a time line on this promise this time. Will not let us slip back into the comfort zone and then have another discussion in two months time. Ugh. Thanks for reading.