Originally Posted by Ladyshipwreck

Happy Easter

I say "happy" but honestly ever since my mom passed away, there is like this cloud of depression for me on every holiday. I dread them. I do find joy through my children but even with that I get sad because she is unable to see them. And most of all I think of my dad. I cannot begin to put into words the gut wrenching sadness I have on every holiday/significant day when I think about my dad and the pain he must have.

I'm totally with you guys on the feeling of impending doom. I get it constantly and can totally relate to being afraid of something like a car running off the road and hitting my kids.
I know a lot of mothers of babies place their hands on the babies back to make sure they're still breathing. I still do that and my "baby" is 8.
I constantly think I get a whiff of something burning and then imagine the house is going to burn down.
Almost every time I drive somewhere more than a couple of miles away, the possibility of getting into a horrible a wreck enters my mind.
In my case I don't think alcohol is not related. I was a chronic worrier as a child as well. I'm sure it played into why I love drinking so much though. I could finally relax without having intrusive thoughts. I thought that quitting drinking would help a lot more than it has actually.

Well I'd say I'm going to stop myself while I'm ahead but I know I've already gotten a little too deep into the darkness. So I'll stop before I reach the Mariana Trench.