I have no clue how I made it through yesterday and today, but at a certain point something kicked in that said "Get your a$$ home now!!" When I got on the freeway and was away from the city, I had a feeling of relief and I grabbed for my benzo in the backpack and swigged some water on road.
It was a stressful day. I got my sick friend to the doctor and she was absolutely 'hysterical.' Crying the entire time. Of course I landed in the center of downtown in the city when I dropped her off at 3:30 and I managed to get out. There's nothing I can do for her. When I was halfway back to my house I told myself to just get back and stay there.
Well I really worked hard to get my car prices down and my father took notice of my work and offered to kick in a huge portion of the bill. Oh my God, what a relief. Uuuuugggghhhhh.
Now I can replace my warped front brakes too. The mechanic will throw the installation in with the job. Napa has a high quality rotor and pad setup at about $150.
I've been up at 7:30a.m every day. I learned Google Spread Sheets yesterday morning and analyzed all of my prices and made invoices (never could have done that drinking). I've made about 20 phone calls. This is a great project to sink my teeth into right now.
I talked to my Doctor of Integrstive Medicine (for my immune issues) today and told her about how I feel, like something good is coming out of my chest. She totally gets it. It's like a rebirth feeling, She congratulated me. Then she recommended more AA meetings and put it in my Treatment Plan gggrrrrrrr. So it's in the computer. I'm sure it already was.
Ok talk later. I'm scared to count days because I don't want to jinx it. Just keep going.
-V
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