Wanted to say hi!
I stumbled across this forum and read some of the posts. I wish I had found it sooner. It made me feel that I'm not alone, gave me hope and I realised that the way I've been treated is pretty standard for an alcoholic relationship (this made me feel better, although I can't fathom why?)
I met my partner when we were 16, we had many, many happy years together, but the last 6 have been hell. Lots of really rubbish things happened to us. I miscarried a baby, fell pregnant again, lost this baby at 5 months, which was just awful, fell pregnant again, then at 8 months pregnant was diagnosed with breast cancer. Our baby survived through my operation and was delivered safely. I then had a year of chemo and rads etc with my baby to look after. (We also have two older children too). About a year after my treatment finished, my partner's father passed away during an operation that was carried out due to alcoholism, his mother then proceeded to starve herself for 6 months and also passed away. So you can see, my partner has lots of reasons to have hit the bottle.
During my treatment he started to hit the bottle hard, I was often left to deal with the family when I was sick. We didn't talk about this really and it wasn't used against him in any way, although he feels guilty. At this time, he used to get drunk and pass out, that was all.
After his parent's passed away he hit the wine boxes, and would pretty much consume nearly a whole one a night. He became emotionally abusive to me and on one occasion physically abusive. My 16 year old son called the police. After that occasion, he stayed out of our house for several months, but came back after counselling. He at no stage, gave up drinking, but he did give up the boxes of wine. We were ok, but he was made redundant and at home a lot. The drinking has ramped up again and the emotional abuse has started again. I can't live like this anymore. My children are suffering the school is aware of the situation etc etc. He is currently sleeping in our motor home on the driveway as money is tight for now. He says he has been to the dr and they will give him disulfiram, he wants back in, our children don't want him near us :-(
Anyway, I know I need help, so here I am. I guess I need support from those who understand and have walked in my shoes. I also need help with my three children my son, 16 years old, 13 year old daughter and 5 year old little boy.