Originally Posted by
Missandy 
My exAbf hits 60 days tomorrow.
That's the most he's had in over 15 years.
We are not on speaking terms. He is focusing on recovery and so am I.
Would it be wrong of me to shoot him a quick text or email congratulating him?
I know it's not a huge milestone but regardless of him and I ever got back together I still care and am proud he's even come this far.
So this hits an interesting chord with me.
I am 13 months sober and I still consider this new to sobriety - sure, I've got a lot of growth under me in that time but it pales in comparison to the rest of my life.
So, first, I'd say 60 days is awesome - and extremely short if he plans to stay sober forever.
Then, I'd say that there's a reason (probably multiple) that you have no contact.
I would also say that focusing on yourself is an excellent plan.
The reason I say all this is because it is advice to myself: I have an ex to whom I need to make amends. I have not - because we have no contact (he was a great person but a huge enabler among other things, while I was drinking) and I
do not know that opening the door to any communication is the best thing for ME. He is also an alcoholic and has not had reason or chosen to stop drinking- as far as I know - and while I care for him (he was a very important part of my life for several years), right now my decision is that I don't need him present in my life and the amends go undelivered.
I am very selective and self-protective about my "circle." It's your call and only you can guess how he will take it or what will happen next- you cannot KNOW- and weighing the benefits of staying mum (for now, let's say) and keeping on your own good road. You can pray for him, wish him the best, send positive thoughts, whatever your manner of encouragement is- without words or interaction.
Good luck.