Musiclady, I understand what you are going through. Sending positive healing energy your way. It's so hard to watch those we love and have cared about for years self medicate and numb themselves. It is sometimes their only coping mechanism. You, however, are taking positive steps toward a better life for you and your children. I wish you the best with the move. Just allow yourself to feel the emotions for now. It's only natural to feel sad. But also know that brighter days are ahead.