I was like your husband for quite some time ... until I got desperate enough in my own isolation and with the negative consequences mounting that I finally made the sustained effort at radical change. It took a long time for me to reach that point. I scrambled and scraped for years trying to protect my ability to drink, even though it hurt my relationship with my spouse, which is finally beginning to mend now that I am not drinking. I was seriously addicted.
I am sorry for what you are going through - it's not your fault, and it sucks. We alcoholics are resentful when confronted with our drinking, even when it is done in the gentle and concerned way it sounds like you presented it to your husband. When we reach the stage of addiction, there is a part of ourselves that will do anything to sustain the habit, and even the care of loved ones may be rebuffed if it threatens the addiction's ability to continue feeding itself.
I hope your husband can find the humility and courage to give it up, but for some of us that takes time and pain ... Perhaps he will get the message sooner rather than later; we can pray for that.
In the meantime, as others have suggested, it might help to get the perspective of those who visit the section for Family of Alcoholics. They have been where you are and may have useful insights.
Wishing you the best.