not my first time thru it and not the worse w/d I've been through. I've been trying to get a handle on this for about 4 years now. Longest sober point was 4 months. I've PTSD and anxiety/panic disorder. I do go to counsel, I take ativan for it, but for so long i used alcohol to get rid of the anxiety and it's finally caught up to me. Thank you all so much for your suggestions. I do know when I need to go the hospital. I've had a few panic attacks that put me there for a few days at a time. But I'm finally tired of it and everything it comes with! It's time to be there for my kids and for my wife and for myself!