I can relate a lot to you.
My boyfriend and I separated 3 months ago. We both were alcoholics - him way more than me. There was an incident, so he finally decided to get help. He moved to be with his family 4 hours from me and get into treatment. We both promised to work on ourselves and our sobriety separately, but our end goal was to get back together to work on our relationship. Literally a week before we separated we went to get my engagement ring sized.
A month ago his mom emailed me to tell me that he had told her that I need to move on. I don't know if that's BS (I think his church and his mom is brainwashing him tbh), but my heart is broken. We were planning our marriage and our lives together. Now in sobriety he wants me to move on?
I've been so proud of him and myself for giving up drinking. But, this is the most devastating thing to come of this. We are both in our 30's and were very serious about starting a family.
I am in the same routine as you. Get up, go to work, go to meetings, come home, don't drink, watch boring shows, go to bed. Rinse, repeat. Even aside from him I feel this deep sense of depression. Very similar to the way you described it.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this too
