I am no longer a big stepper. I have been at a time in my life. I would say though that this sounds certainly a resentment. That is the primary gist of the 5th step, or rather 4th which goes into the 5th. It is up to you. I know one thing, I am much more comfortable with things in my past now than I was at one time. I think that has a lot to do with age. At some point if we work on things we accept ourselves, our past, and maybe somewhat just don't give a cr** what another person thinks of what we reveal. I don't know, but these things do become easier.