ClearLight, The big issue with AA always seems to be religion based.
Most of us were given an image of what God is when we were growing up. So when God is discussed there is a lot of already preconceived notions that come up. I always find it interesting to hear from those who have no association with what they were taught growing up when they decide to work the steps. It gives good understanding of the absence of religion and the introduction to spirituality.
I heard a recent share at a meeting from an atheist. It was pretty awesome to witness.
He, like you, had been sober for long periods of time but without actually doing the steps. This past time through he came to the realization that nothing seemed to work long term for him. Although he attended AA throughout those sober bouts of time, being an atheist, he just didn't pay attention to anything that pointed towards God. This time through he decided to give it his all. To just do what was suggested by his sponsor and to work the steps. He passed the 9 month mark last month and said that this time has been completely different for him. That he's amazed that he's been able to maintain his sobriety and to actually be happy about it. That although somewhat still of the atheist mindset he now also says that he can't deny that there's something there because with his old way of thinking he would never be where he is today and feel the way that he does. That this time through there are some pretty amazing things that have happened in his life that he would have never thought possible. The only difference between past attempts and this are the steps. He can now no longer deny that there has to be a greater force, not that he yet understands what that is, but that it must exist due to the fact that this is the only difference.
The absence of religion in your life is one thing, the absence of spirituality is another.
You will find people in this program who equate the Big Book to the Bible (the word of God based on whatever they were taught growing up). If that's what it is for them then why should that bother us? It's what it is for "them" and doesn't mean that it's "our" understanding. What your understanding of "God" is will be entirely up to you. For me it's the positive and ever present energy that exists within me. It's that inner voice that's always there letting me know when I'm doing something wrong or right. That is my God consciousness. It has never steered me wrong.
What other people think God is has nothing to do with what you think God is. The words in that book and your work through the steps will be a gift to you and will come from whatever that ends up being for you.
My hope for you is that you see this same power and find what that represents for you through working the steps. It will be the most personal thing you will ever experience.