One month down
Hi guys,
I've been reading the forums for a while now and thought I would introduce myself and tell you about my story.
I've always enjoyed a drink. Started off with a four pack on a Friday night with my mates in my teenage years. Then the usual university drinking. I think I probably drank more than others but it didn't seem like an issue at the time. Drinking is so ingrained in our culture; it's the norm!
The past year or so things had got a lot worse. I went from drinking on Friday and Saturday to maybe one night in the week. The week day drinking then escalated to every day. We're not just talking a beer or two - my weapon of choice was white rum and coke. Started off with a fifth of a bottle (1lt) to a quarter, to a third to a half. I would wake up feeling pretty terrible but I got used to it.
The reason for my drinking was work-related anxiety. If I drank at night I wouldn't think about the things that make me anxious. So it seemed like a good system. Just make it until 18.00. That way I can get drunk, not worry, then wake up and try to get to 18.00 again without thinking too much.
But of course I then entered a viscous circle. My anxiety the next day would be multiplied. My increasing tolerance meant I had to drink more. Drinking more increased my anxiety. Because I was more anxious I had to drink more. The warning signs for me was when I could get through half a bottle of rum and still feel anxious. The once calming effect of the alcohol had stopped working.
With the help of reading the forums here and the advice that people have offered I am now over a month sober.
After the first day I felt great. Waking up without a hangover was great! After the third day I experienced a relaxing tingly sensation throughout my body. Things pretty much then plateaued apart from maybe 3-4 separate days of feeling tired or anxious. I now feel like this is something I will do for the rest of my life. I cannot be trusted with alcohol. One drink will turn into 5. One day a week will turn into 7.
Thanks for all the posts you guys have made. You honestly have made a huge difference to my recovery. Here's to the long journey ahead together!