He's choosing the alcohol.....
Ok, so first let me give you a little background....4 Years ago my marriage ended because of his alcoholism. 6 years ago (2011) my little sister (she was 34 at the time) died because of alcohol-i pulled the plug. In 2009 my grand dad died because of 'DT's after falling down drunk (he before his neck in the fall) In 2002 my father suggested a seizure (because of severe 'DT's) that sent him into a stroke which caused a aneurysm. He survived, but it's nothing of the career military man he used to be. He needs constant care, we cut his food for him, help him pull up his pants when he uses the bathroom, my brother even dresses in his swim trunks and shower shoes to bathe him. I have had a couple boyfriends here and there who drank and I am no stranger to alcohol either....I guys I was 'lucky' enough to see what I was doing to myself and others. Today I will not touch alcohol for anything in this world. HOWEVER......................
I don't know how I got where I am right now. I know better.... But,none- the-lhe-less, here I am. 6 months ago I returned to Colorado to help family members with personal issues (unrelated) When i arrived an old friend and I decided to reconnect. Now, I've literally known this man since I was 5 years old. He'd bring frogs and snakes to my house when I was a kid. We went to school with each other all the way through high school. We are in our mid 40s now. Since the moment we re-met 6 months ago we have been inseparable. I live with him, his grown son, and his elderly mother. We plan to be married in the spring of 2019.
Here is my life altering problem. He is a horrible alcoholic. He's not abusive in any way (except when he's sleeping and been drinking too way much) he goes to work everyday, and is prefect in other way. He brings home a 12 pack every day and can't go to bed until he's finished it. (even if it's not the only 12 pack he opened that day) he knows what's happened in my past....he knows everything about it. He knows how it makes me feel....I've told him what happened with my sister. (she didn't die immediately. I sat next to her for months while trying to save her, and failed) he told me last night that he chose the beer....but he'd 'cry,cry,cry' over losing me. I am heart broken. Should I just pack my **** and never look back? PLEASE HELP ME. I never thought I'd be confused over such a predicament. God help me