"that it is all I look forward to. Everything else pales in comparison"
^^^^
This is the alcoholism. It deadens your interest in everything and anything after a while. Nothing looks as interesting or fun unless it involves alcohol. The more, the better.
I stayed away from drinking long enough to figure out that there were things I liked to do without drinking. That alcohol wasn't the solution to all of my problems. That alcohol didn't enhance my joy in any celebrations. All it did was numb me.
In the end I didn't do anything OTHER than drink. Alone. There was no joy in that.