Mentium

I am very close to a cousin of mine. We are in some ways more like brothers - in fact he once told me (while drunk!) that he wished I was his brother, rather than his older bro, who is a bit of a pain in the rear at times. He lives about 100 miles away and every so often over the years he and his wife stay with us for a weekend. The weekends tend to consist of a nice meal out, lots (lots) of booze, staying up until two or three and talking bollocks - sometimes for two nights in a row over the weekend. When together we tend to drink a great deal - actually more than my old daily consumption by some margin.

His place being a lot smaller we have not stayed with them but he and his wife were clearly feeling they owed us one as it were so I suggested I go visit alone 'some time'.

The invitation arrived today by phone and it is for a couple of weekends hence.

I told him I would let him know by the end of this week and I have pondered on how to handle this for the last hour or two.

I'm only 19 days alcohol free and it will only be a month when that weekend arrives. I don't trust myself to be in a boozy situation so soon after quitting quite frankly nut simply turning down the invitation without an explanation would be hurtful.

I could tell him I am 'on the wagon' but I am pretty sure I would be under some pressure to 'have a night off' which would be a very bad idea indeed. I could tell him I'm going to AA, to give him some idea of how serious the issue is for me, but I would have some anxiety he would tell his sister and brother and it would be common knowledge around our extended family, which I would not like.

Or I could make up some sort of excuse and just put him off for a few more weeks or a couple of months.

Typing this out in order to process it as much as anything. Thoughts very welcome but I know I either have to share my 'secret' with him or else tell a white lie or two and put off the weekend for a good while.