Nightingale77.....correction....
Damned if you do--but NOT damned if you don't)....
Please, please, study the "stickies"...the articles that are j ust above the threads of this forum. It is abootcamp of learning about alcoholism and co-dependency....
There is a lot to learn!!
Thankfully...you recognized that you have been enabling him.
You can't save him. You don't have the power..no matter how hard you try....
You have been with him for 14months and it hasn't stopped him....
(not drinking is not the same as recovery, by the way).
If he wants recovery, he will go to AA and work a strong and diligent program...on his own volition.....
If he doesn't...he isn't ready.....
(he may make some weak verbal promises...but watch his ACTIONS....not his words....Words can be very cheap, sometimes.....
good for you on not buying that bottle!