Lbg.....the best person to help an alcoholic is other alcoholics...and, professionals especially trained to work with alcoholism.
You are not qualified to help him with his addiction...because you are too close to the situation and you still have much to learn about the disease, yourself.
Actually, he probably does feel like crap. That is common for someone who is trying to give up the bottle and struggling with early recovery.
I had to learn to take everything an alcoholic says with a grain of salt...a chunk of salt. ***Especially, in the middle of the night when they are cry ing the blues and feeling sorry for themselves...and, trying to pull their enablers back into the vortex. LOL...many times, they don't even remember what they said the ni ght before.....
He has to apply himself to the program of recovery with diligence...and, be willing to do whatever it is that he is directed to do....by his recovery group....
You don't have to sound mean.....but, if you get involved...you will pull him and yourself, both, down.....
It doesn't make you a bad person...it makes you a compassionate person who understands what is the best thing to do.....and, has the strength to do it.....