Sorry you had to come here, but glad you found us.
The one big thing I learned the more I stayed here is that I wasn't alone, and that was the first step towards many more steps on the journey through this. It is a heartbreaking situation that you are in, but there is knowledge, wisdom, support, and care to be had here.
Read, post, share, and know that all of the answers will not come instantly, but WILL come, and the fact that you are here shows that you are ready to start on a path to your own recovery from this difficult situation.
Hope to hear more from you. Let us know how you are doing or how we can help.