Uncomfortable/Embarrassed
O.k. last night a member showed up who sixteen years ago had eight years of continuous sobriety and was considered by many a poster boy for AA.
The last time I saw him at a meeting was maybe six months ago. He had finished a stint in rehab and was back on track. He'd seen the light and that was that. He was sober and going to stay that way.
Last night he shared he's back to square one and has five days. He was embarrassed and no one had much to say to him after the meeting. I caught up with him outside and said it was good to see him. Unfortunately after loudly declaring the last time things were going to be different he seems to have lost credibility with others in the room and is embarrassed.
The point of this post is to suggest if you're in AA, go back out and return it might be best not to make any declarations. Maybe keep a low profile. Keep things one day at a time. You're back and that is what is important.
The fellow last night seemed uncomfortable and embarrassed. But he was the one who made the point when sharing how that last time would be different.
And when you're in a small AA community it's not easy to hide.
People remember what you say.