Thank you for comforting me Irishgardens. I'm doing exactly what you said ( below):
"right now, it is enough to just be you and to be your best self and experience the feelings as they are-no, more than enough".
I have never felt this bad in my whole life and I so much want to believe life is going to get better, like you said. Right now I'm stuck in my emotions, feeling like I won't surive without my AH and forever heartbroken because my son won't have a father. Thank you for cheering me up.
Thanking all of you who are posting. I wouldn't make it without you. You're my lifeboat.
Hugs