Oh gosh, I feel for you. Don't worry about their opinion of your gift. Sounds like you could just buy them booze and they'd be happy. I think your plan is a good one -- come by around lunch, leave before dinner. You don't have to stay long. Not sure where your dad is but if it's not too cold outside, go for a walk with your kids or something. There has to be someone else there who doesn't drink -- find a kindred soul! Or just leave if it gets too much. Maybe you can meet your dad for lunch or something (with no stepmom) before you leave. Good luck.