about how I am so judgmental
well to some degree, you are....you DID make judgement about her actions and behaviors and what you will and will not accept. there is NOTHING wrong with that.......unless of course you are the alcoholic and someone has just called you on your sh!t!!!
don't back down. this may widen the gap between you, but no one said establishing and upholding boundaries was for wussies!
i know my mom dearly adored my daughter, her ONLY grandchild. but she couldn't stay sober for her or during time with her, any more than she could for any other reason.
the booze came first. the breathing. then everything else.