I reflected on it a bit today and realized...she apparently didn't care at all that I have not spent holidays with them. She was angry that I don't let my kids go to see them.
There was an attitude that they somehow have a right to my kids, right along with an underlying attitude that I, as their parent, am simply of no consequence.
I've seen this from my siblings before--where they treat me as if I'm even less than a nanny, nothing more than the housekeeper for these kids, and don't have to be consulted at all.
But then, I've seen them do this with an in-law they don't like--treat her as if her husband is their nephew/son/grandson, rather than her husband, as if she simply has no say her own marriage but they somehow do.
Is this a typical thing in alcoholic or dysfunctional families?