Originally Posted by
geelouise 
Hi, sorry to hear you've been having a stressful time! I hope this isn't impertinent, but I'm curious - why does it bother you that he uses porn? Maybe it's a generational thing, but it's not something that I would find unusual in a partner or a friend, although I do have a friend who struggles with watching too much which causes him distress. Hope you don't mind me asking.
Porn becomes a problem when it upsets the spouse
Porn becomes a problem when it interferes in every day life
Porn becomes a problem when the porn addicted spouse is so consumed by it that's all they can/do think about
Porn is like alcoholism/drug addiction. It starts small (think "Playboy") then as the addiction grows, they need more and more raunchy stimulation to get the same high.
Prom is a problem when the porn addicted spouse lies his ASS OFF about everything.
Think of it this way - if he has to hide it, delete it, lie about it, it's already a problem. It's a form of infidelity people do not understand unless they've stood on those shoes.
Sorry to sound so harsh.... but this situation for me is all of the above.