Originally Posted by
v0da12 
What has been bothering me for a good amount of time now is the question ' Am i an alcoholic?'
Has it been bothering you because you are legitimately concerned about where you are headed if you continue to drink as you do, or because you've taken to the idea that only alcoholics can't drink, and you don't actually want to give up the option of getting drunk whenever you really want to?
Originally Posted by
v0da12 i am super confused and cannot really think straight nor explain how i feel exactly.
Confused, or ambivalent about continuing to drink? Does the idea of never ever drinking alcohol ever again feel really, really scary?
If so, you probably want someone to tell you if you can keep on drinking or not. The problem is that anyone can keep on drinking, provided that they are prepared to pay the piper, as you apparently are starting to. Know that the price of doing so will indeed go up over time, just as you presently suspect.
Since you are drinking heavily every day, and apparently really love the buzz you get from doing so, I would suggest abstaining for an entire year, without having one single drop of alcohol. That will give you a reasonably good idea of just how dependent you are on alcohol.
That will also give you a lot of free time to consider whether or not drinking is worth the inherent risk.