Hi C3-
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I hadn't heard of this 5th column part til this thread.
I didn't do it formally when I did step 4, but in thinking about the concept....I see it in play in my life in a rear-view-finder kind of way. A smaller mirror to look at the past (as in, we do not regret the past nor do we shut the door on it, BB paraphrase) and a wider lens for the present/future, as in "how does God want me to handle this, do that now?"The taking out of self ("flipping it" as my bf and I call it, when turning an issue, problem (disturbance), etc around - away from the "I" and onto the other, and their needs/wants/etc) - and truly, use of the pause and the listen buttons.
Lately, I have been working a lot on the concept of active prayer. An example would be one day recently when I had just been....struggling....just kind of out of sorts so I decided to have a running dialogue with God throughout my lunch shift at the restaurant. Whatever popped into my head. Literally - "ok, just got a table, what should I say to them first?" as in "hmm, maybe I'll start with a different type of greeting" or something totally inane just to mix it up....that became increasingly subconscious as the day went on and I swear I felt like I was reacting to things more smoothly because I had the right stage director in my ear. This may sound weird or not make sense, but it was a fun little exercise.
Here at 9 months I find that keeping the past compartmentalized enough to be at peace - I simply cannot change even the worst stuff and the stuff I reallllly wish I could- and using the present and forward-thinking (ie, big stuff like how does God want my relationship with C to keep growing? Is x decision the right one for the us we are building? and such) context of what God wants me to do, and learning to listen for that instruction better, is where I am in my recovery.