Originally Posted by
ScottFromWI 
Welcome back Charx. My guess is that the reason you do this is that you are an alcoholic like me and most of the rest of the folks here on SR. There really no good answer to why either, we simply are.
Antabuse can help you stop drinking, but it is not a cure for addiction in itself. It's just a pill that makes you sick if you drink alcohol. And it's designed to be used as a supplement to a recovery program of some kind. Have you tried meetings or rehab or therapy at all?
I've been in therapy a long while now, yes. I've been to three meetings total over the past 8 months, same place, but I can't get myself to keep going. Just cannot seem to snap out of it and make myself better. I'm well aware this is an issue and I should not be doing it..I don't find much of a like for it as I did before...but as with everything I do...compulsive random sexual encounters, cutting, smoking weed, drinking alcohol.. it's so impulsive and I'm so addicted to all of these mannerisms..
Not sure what kind of excuse I can come up with as to why my face is so red..while at work at this current moment..
I just hope nobody asks..as someone already has suspected something is wrong (but perhaps crying they think)...maybe their mind won't go straight to "oh my god..he has drunk rash...while at work.."