Really struggling.
I am not drinking and in the moment can say I have no desire to do so but I am afraid. I "slipped" (drank) this summer once and that let to a series of episodes where my sobriety was interrupted and resulted in final plunge into what I would call a full on "relapse"- though not drinking as heavily as I once was and not drinking daily it was slipping fast. Semantics aside, I caught myself, as I really wanted to and have my new sober (and hopefully last) date as the 20th of October. I am satisfied with this progress and feel hopeful. I am suffering what I can now look back and see that I was suffering during my initial successful sober period, serious cognitive issues. I feel constantly groggy, my short term memory has nearly evaporated and I feel I am in a constant state of confusion and incapability of managing my work and general day to day activities. I rely heavily on my calendar to assist me with this but it is not enough. I am not sure how to get through this and am looking for suggestions/tips. As always I will speak clearly with my psychiatrist, I have an appointment scheduled for one week from today. I like being able to go to him for psycho-therapy in addition to having him monitor my medications closely. I am slipping fast and it is scary. I know two things- drinking may temporarily ease these symptoms but it is NOT the long term solution. I do need a short term solution though as I must go forward in my day to day life. Really putting in the effort here folks. Working my plan, going to AA (even when I don't like it), taking my meds, checking in here, waking up every day with the sole goal of just not drinking today. But I need some support. Thanks.