Thank you everyone for your kind words. I was a wreck this morning, but finally got to talk to him this evening and he sounded so good, happy, and hopeful. It's the most spark I've heard from him in years. I know I need to work on myself now. It is the best time, with him being gone. I've never been to an AA meeting..just nervous going alone, not knowing anybody, but I know I need to do something. Going cold turkey without any kind of support system has not worked for me in the past. I know I need to just take the plunge..headfirst..