First, you are in the wrong having any contact with him at all while he is with her. Just plain wrong, no matter what he tells you about her. He is married to her and not you and no telling what he might say about you to her, but none of that is important, what is important is that you should RUN!!!
You stated this -
He tells me he still loves her but they are incompatible (she hates his drinking???) That he feels I might be his soul mate.
Does this mean you are okay with him at a bar!! He is an alcoholic and will say anything. RUN!