It took me nearly 3 years to silence all those voices. Be gentle with yourself.
A trick I heard that helped me was from Steve Hasssan who deals with people who have been subjected to undue influence via authoritarian groups. It works for other things too. Imagine going back to the time someone made you feel that way. Knowing what you know now, and being an adult that can stand up for yourself, say or do what you would do now. Give yourself a do over. For example: I got into big trouble for taking an academic award. They raked me over the coals for trying to bring glory to myself. I had to take all the abuse and then on top of it I had to thank them for taking time to counsel me on my bad behavior. I can't even type out what I said to them in my mind the second time when I relieved that experience. It doesn't bother me anymore. They are a bunch of cowardly idiots just like i told them.
Reading Zen parables helped too. there is probably something on this blog that can help you.
8 Zen Master Stories That Illustrate Important Truths | Thought Catalog
Mostly, I just kept coming here and talking about it. If you want to get better spend your time with people trying to get better as well. Someone is always willing to offer support or great links, something will make sense. Bre Brown is really good and so is ZeFrank. You can come through it. I probably could have benefited from professional help but i didn't realize how screwed up I was.
Fav Bre Brown:
https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brow...me?language=en
Fav ZeFrank:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYlCVwxoL_g