(((Vic))))
I'm so glad that you stayed straight!
You know it won't help you feel better; only worse in the long run.
The others have given you such great advice...I just want you to know I'm proud of you for staying straight! You can do this! You're just under a lot of new experiences and it's stressful.
The one thing I might add is this... Every day, do something in each of the following categories for yourself.
Physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. That will keep you fit. And when we fill these needs for ourselves, we feel better; when we feel better, that little voice that wants to get you will not be able to make any headway.
Oh, and Vic...next time, go into the coffee shop with the others. You DO belong there. They WILL accept you. But, Vic, they have to know that you're in need for them to help you!
Please be good to yourself. You are a child of G*D and deserve all that is good...
Shalom!