The change has to come within you. And part of that change is the realization that your attempt to moderate did not work. As many before you have come to understand, moderation works only for those who do not have to even think about moderation. Once you understand that abstinence is most likely the only thing that will work, you have to adapt your mind to the acceptance of that.
Giving up drinking, regardless of how you go about it – not drinking at all works for everyone – seems to be the only way going forward. Once you accept that as your new reality and embrace it wholly, you can begin to change your attitude about everything.
As far as help goes, the first thing you have to do is to convince yourself that this is the only way. Once you are 'on board' with that, the rest is up to you. Don't think about "not being allowed" to drink, or possibly drinking in the future. That will lead to your downfall. You have to become a non-drinker, and that's the bottom line.