Sugar - day 3 is quite an accomplishment in itself. I went years without being able to do that.
Forgiving oneself is easier said than done. For me, I find it difficult to forgive myself even when I know I will feel better for doing so. In that moment I don't believe I deserve forgiveness. Sometimes I will pray for willingness to forgive myself. If that doesn't work I try praying for the willingness for the willingness to forgive myself.
You have just made it through 3 days of hell. Maybe it is time to give yourself a break and realize that you are doing the best you can for the moment.