Flutter,
I just wanted to say well done on your decision! I was in a similar situation in which I also had to make the call to social services on a neighbour. I also worried that she would find out it was me.
However the moral decision was to protect the two small children left in her care by her husband. (who fled to save himself...long story) It was a very long process to get those children into a safe place but that first phone call to social services is the first step to hopefully a better life for everyone involved (present and future)
That one call will ripple through hopefully to the right services for everyone. If the system works (unfortunately we know it does not sometimes) than you will have started a change for the better in many lives.
Its not easy and lots of people turn a blind eye to suspected abuse or neglect for fear of getting involved. I can't tell you the amount of times my neighbours 3 year old son was found walking naked on the main road only to be brought home by numerous neighbours (without reporting anything to either the police or social services) ... its so strange.
I found him once as I was coming home from work and a man was putting him in his car. Perfect timing on my part... I pulled over at once and questioned the man as he was picking him up to put in his car. He did not know this child and said he was going to take him to the police station. I told him I was the boys neighbour and I took the child from him and walked the boy (left my car on the side of the road) back to my neighbours place. I advise her what happened and she looked like she just woke up and was very out of it. The situation can be left to your imagination as to what could have happened to that boy. (I don't feel this man had any bad intentions)... BUT what if?
This is when I called Social Services... So Flutter, just remember what you see or what you have seen is just a snippet of what is going on and what could be worse behind closed doors. Good on you for taking notice and reporting. I work for the government so I am held to mandatory reporting so I knew my obligations but even so it is REALLY hard to do when you know you are reporting on and dealing with someone who is unstable due to mental illness, under the influence of drugs and alcohol and/or both... you do feel like you are putting yourself at risk in some way.
In my case it all worked out for the best and the police and social services were so kind in reassuring me that it was the best decision. The kids were removed after a lengthy time from her care and she got help and so did the kids.
There is a good link on Why Abuse is not reported:
just put the in front of the web address for some reason I can not post a link until I have 15 posts??
preventchildabusehc.org/reporting-abuse/why-children-don-t-report
It's just a reminder... nothing we all don't already know... but I just wanted to say again...Well done and you've hopefully taken the first step in helping this family and preventing any future people getting caught up in the cycle repeating itself.
"Wounded children become wounded adults, and wounded adults can destroy themselves and possibly others" - unknown- but oh so true!!