To new beginnings
Hope everyone is keeping it together. This is my first post on this forum. I have been binge drinking for 20+ years and everything bad that has happened in my life is directly or indirectly connected to my alcohol consumption. It started as a coping mechanism for anxiety/OCD issues and helped initially but now has total control of my life. I have been trying to quit for the last one year and have been sober for 2-3 months but keep making the same mistakes. I have no doubt that this evil/disease will take away everything that I love and care for but I still cannot get myself to quit. I am at a place where I would go as far as considering an antabuse implant or any sort of alcohol vasectomy to get myself out of this rut. All suggestions welcome. I have been sober only 3 days now but if I give in again, I will lose all hope.